Dear Faith Family,
One of my biggest pet peeves is complaining, probably because I do so much of it myself! No matter the number of positive affirmations or the consistency of daily graces, my heart is prone to hone in on the difficulties of a day, a relationship, or task. Whether the discomfort is slight or stiffening, a self-inflicted obstacle or an external impediment, I sometimes feel the psalm from Sunday is true, "my life is a vomit of groans" (Psalm 38:8). And frankly, I hate living that way.
No one likes being around a complainer, not even the complainer themselves, yet Psalm 38 is known as a "Complaint Psalm." It is a poetic prayer that lets God in on all the difficulties of the day/life/world manifesting in our hearts. And while you'd be right to think God doesn't need to be "let in" to know of such realities, our faith heritage for thousands and thousands of years has taught us that God desires to be let into our heart (disoriented or otherwise):
My child, give me your heart, and let your eyes delight in my ways.
(Proverbs 23:26)
I slept, but my heart was awake. A sound! My beloved is knocking. 'Open to me, my sister, my love, my dove, my perfect one..."
(Song of Solomon 5:2)
Psalm 38, like the other "Complaint Psalms," teaches us that now, especially in the season of Lent, is the time to complain. And while my inner voice wants to fire back, "Stop complaining!" the Spirit says, "Don't hold back." Because, as we've learned, letting God into our disoriented heart is an act of hope.
When we complain to God, we are saying that we are finished, that we are done with this life as we experience it. Indeed our complaint declares that we are done with the same old situations, the same old possibilities, the same old false fixes, the same old defenses and pretenses, essentially saying, "Father, into your hands I commit my spirit!" And so our complaint becomes our confession (perhaps for the first time) that we are utterly in need of something new, something that can only be received.
For in you, God, I hope...my God—you will answer!... Hurry and help me; I want some wide-open space in my life!
(Psalm 38:15,22)
When we complain at people, spilling our vomit of groans into their laps, we usually leave a mess. When we complain to people, our vulnerable confessions of feelings can be an admittance of being done with the old and longing for something different. Still, in the complexity of relationships, our complaints may not be received as a step towards something new, but yet another form of opposition. However, whenever we open our hearts to God, letting Him in on our disorientation, there is an ever-consistent response: I hear...I see...I know...and I, too, want more for you:
Look at me. I stand at the door. I knock. If you hear me call and open the door, I'll come right in and sit down to supper with you.
(Revelation 3:20)
So go ahead and complain! May your complaining to God lead you to the table prepared for you, even in the presence of those things which compel your complaining.
Love you, faith family! God bless.