All in vain have I kept my heart clean and washed my hands in innocence. - Psalm 73:13
In this psalm, Asaph is reflecting on a season where he was “envious of the arrogant” and he “saw the prosperity of the wicked.” All the while, he is trying to keep his heart clean and his hands from evil.
As I was reflecting on this psalm, the weight of Asaph trying to do the “right” thing stands out. He is trying to keep his heart clean and his hands from doing evil and yet, what does it get him? He looks around at those who are clearly not trying to do anything to remain pure and innocent; however, they are the ones experiencing success, wealth and health. Asaph is hurt and becomes entitled to what he sees because of HIS perceived righteous efforts resulting in an embittered heart towards the Lord. Why are they experiencing these blessings and I’m here stumbling barely holding on?
Asaph tries to solve the answer to this question without coming into the presence of the Lord and it was a “wearisome task” - it was only when he came to the sanctuary of God, that he discerned not only the reality of the wicked but his true heart condition.
In verses 21 and 22, Asaph confesses his sin. He recognizes “his soul was embittered, when (he) was pricked at heart” and he was “brutish and ignorant” and a “beast toward [God]”. In doing so, his heart of entitlement transforms to a heart dependent on grace.
Immediately, he contrasts these verses with the remaining verses using the word “nevertheless” - as in, “in spite of my sin, this is the actual condition of my heart - not by MY efforts, but by who YOU are and what YOU have done”.
I am continually with you, YOU hold my right hand.
YOU guide me with your counsel, and afterward YOU will receive me to glory.
In this posture of humility, Asaph worships God in a loving dependence and desire.
Whom have I in heaven but you?
And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
The reality of the wicked is certain. …those who are far from you shall perish; you put an end to everyone who is unfaithful to you. (v.27) Our sin separates us from God; nevertheless, through the death and resurrection of Jesus, we now have unobstructed access to the same inviting and merciful God we witness in Psalm 73. Let us then be like Asaph, making the Lord God our refuge, experiencing that it is good to be near God and tell others of all HIS works.
- Dana H.